August 19, What is my biggest phobia?

What is my biggest phobia?

Well, to make sure that I REALLY understood the word phobia I decided to look it up.

According to Merriam-Webster -

The simple definition of phobia:  an extremely strong dislike or fear of someone or something.

The full definition:   an exaggerated usually inexplicable and illogical fear of a particular object, class of objects, or situation.

I am not fond of either definition - too extreme. There are things that I'm not comfortable with, but not so much that I would avoid those situations at all costs.

So, what is my phobia? I am not comfortable at gatherings that are larger than small group size - unless I choose the people that will attend. Like if we do a party of  epic proportions like our pumpkin parties of years past. Even if there is an event that our church would be hosting, I really have to psyche myself up for anything where we'll be sitting around and visiting with other people. The exception would be when the packing party is happening and that's not much of a problem for me because that's work and I like to do something if I need to be around people. I don't necessarily enjoy things like baby or bridal showers, unless they are for someone that I am well acquainted with. Just too much chatter in those gatherings.

I'm kind of a loner of sorts. I don't mind being alone, but at the same time I do need to be with "normal" people now and then. Normal being people that I invest time into and with whom I have shared a long friendship with. It is true that I can count on one had the people that I trust enough to share the good, bad and ugly with any day of the week. Then there is the next level who might get the good and bad. Then there are those that I cannot trust - the ones I choose to not hang around if I can help it.

Yep...but I'll probably stay in my bubble for as long as I can or until next Monday.